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Thursday, 14 December 2017

Day 2382 - Stupidity, Despair, Giros, Teresas, Fence-Sitters and Legal dreams

Morrissey (as @TrueMorfessa) made a brief appearance on Twitter yesterday, tweeting:

"Stupidity sells and intelligence repels."

The tweet was obviously aimed at the recent hysterical headlines, and is a tweet that our Mozzer has posted on various other occasions. FTM records show me that he tweeted the same thing to Justin Bieber on Sunday June 24th 2012, whilst on Wednesday May 14th 2014 he tweeted, "Stupidity sells and intelligence repels. Except in Morrissey's World."

Morrissey's only other tweet was in response to Heather, who had pointed out that the "stupidity sells" tweet was even more true now than when first tweeted. Morrissey replied, "I despair."
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Although Morrissey's visit to the public bar of The Wrong Arms was brief, I did spend a few hours, on and off, chatting with him via Twitter's DM - or The Wrong Arms toilets as I prefer to call DM.
I won't give a report of all we talked about, as much of it was idle chit chat, but here are some highlights:

MOZ: Jon the Con is NOT a pessoa. This needs correcting. The band wearing turquoise is a fabrication.

ME: Oh, ffs! I've spent ages looking for those f***ing turquoise shirts! If Jon isn't a pessoa, then he is definitely from within your 'camp'.

MOZ: They most certainly are not! Jon the Con is absolutely not my creation. You only need to ask. I'm always forthcoming with the answers.

I have to say, I burst out laughing when I read that last sentence. "Always forthcoming with the answers"? Yeah, right!
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I can't believe that I spent so long looking for an old MorrisseysWorld article that referenced the Morrissey band wearing turquoise suits, when there never was one. That rotten old Jon the Con has a lot to answer for....whoever he is!

Here are some more highlights, beginning with Moz making reference to the Der Spiegel dispute:

MOZ: I have written another statement of retaliation - it's a page full of expletives.

ME: Bollocks! Cunty bollocks. Wanky cunty bollocks!

MOZ: I feel like being generous. Give me accounts and aliases you wish to uncover. Ask and I will reveal.

ME: Dawn.

MOZ: Shared.

ME: Astra.

MOZ: I believe Nicole. Do you remember them?

ME: I remember Nicole. Whatever happened to her? And Willow? And I don't believe you. Astra is you. Why am I asking, you just pluck names at random. They're all you, you, you.

MOZ: They are not all my creations. I assure you.

ME: What about Broken?

MOZ: I can't deny Broken.

ME: I love Broken.

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MOZ: I notice you've not asked who Dawn was a joint effort alongside. Are you not intrigued?

ME: I didn't expect an answer. Go on then...

MOZ: I'm bored of this already.

(This made me laugh)

ME: I'm off to the post office now. Do you want anything bringing in?

MOZ: Is this a new career move? Postmaster General.

ME: I'm flattered that you hold me in such high regard. I would have thought you'd suggest I apply for the position of stamp licker...

MOZ: Giro day? Surely no one works on the Isle of Wight? 

3. TERESA, TERESA

On Tuesday I published a list of all 286 of Morrissey's songs. Whilst compelling the list, I came across a few titles that I had never heard of before, including one called Teresa, Teresa. It is highly unlikely to be a song about the current UK Prime Minister as: A) It was recorded in 2007, and B) Theresa May has an 'h' in her name.
The reason I am mentioning this song is because Morrissey obviously prefers the name Teresa without an 'h', which coincidentally, so does the 'fake' Morrissey who interacts with our merry little group on Twitter. Back in March; with Westminster in a state of lockdown, 'Fake Moz' (as @AlfsButton) tweeted, "As long as Teresa May is safe and the royal family remain secure then that is all that matters. People of England, you do not matter." 
It's only a little coincidence, but I shall add it to the list. I added the song onto the list of ones that I would like to hear live, but as it's never actually been heard by anyone, anywhere, so I shan't hold my breath.
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4. THE MORRISSEY GANG

Yesterday I wrote that the audio of Morrissey's interview with Der Spiegel had been released, and following the release, surprise surprise, all the ex-Morrissey fans once again took to social media and Morrissey-Solow to stick another knife into old Mozzer. We are now at the point where every time Morrissey says anything about anything, these ex-fans come out to shout how they hate him even more than they did the last time he said something. But not only have we got these simpletons who have been bought by the headlines of the media, we also have the fans who just can't make up their mind if they want to stay a fan or not - the fence-sitters.

Yesterday a number of these fence-sitters took to Twitter to say how they needed to hear the audio so they could decide if Morrissey really did say what Der Spiegel printed...even though Morrissey has never denied saying what he said. When it transpired that he did say what everyone already knew he had said, the fence-sitters then started to tweeting things like, "it is testing to remain a fan" and, "I wish he wouldn't open his mouth." These lily-livered morons are just as bad as the simpletons.I decided to take a few of the fence-sitters to task, and tweeted, "After 35 years, you surely must have decided whether: A) Morrissey is a balanced individual who you will stick by whatever is said or B) He isn't and you won't.

A tweeter called, Steven Tallach (@steventallach - it does exactly what it says on the tin) replied to me by saying, "Why do you have to be in or out? We're talking about music appreciation here. Nobody's obliged to support Morrissey today just cos they did yesterday." I responded thus:

"No, it's more than just music appreciation with Morrissey. Everyone knows Morrissey fans are different. We're like a gang. And when in a gang, you either roll together or get out."
I added, "I'm actually enjoying this pruning of the tree."

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I'm not holding my breath that anything will change. If tomorrow Morrissey states, "Britain is always wet", the media will print the headline, "Bigmouth strikes again - Morrissey blames climate change on immigration", at which point the simpleton ex-fans will again scream, "I can't believe the man who helped me through my teens is such a nazi. This latest outburst proves it more than ever.... I always had my worries after Bengali in Platforms and The National Front Disco, and let's NEVER forget that he called the Chinese a sub-species and likened mass murder to KFC. I am so glad that Morrissey is no longer part of my life"......although of course, he very much IS, whilst the fence-sitters will ask the opinion of all their muesli eating mates on Twitter, before then stating exactly the same thing as last time, i.e. , "I gets harder and harder to defend Morrissey, I do wish he'd just sing his songs, and not say anything." Arghhh!
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AND FINALLY

And finally, my eye was caught by this quote posted on Twitter yesterday - it comes from List of the Lost:

"...and the flashy Maserati swirled from kerbside and home to the cosy ecstasy of Issac's inner climate, where all of his dreams were perfectly legal..."

What is it with legal dreams?

*Goes off singing* Spent the day in bed, it's a consolation when all my dreams, are perfectly legal

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